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| sunmi's legs look so thin here.!!! she's one of my fav thinspo's in kpop. also i've realized i've basically rotted my brain because i'll see really underweight people and think they look healthy? apparently i look really thin but i literally cannot see it i still feel like my original fat 120lb self.. dysmorphia is genuinely sick |
- choco chip banana pancakes (251kcal)
- mini chocolate bar (160kcal)
- strawberry banana smoothie (~430kcal)
net: 841kcal
weight: 104.6lbs / 47.4kg
bmi: 16.4
≽^•༚• ྀི≼
i gained i want to kill myself ughhhh maybe i logged the shrimp wrong yesterday :(. i was planning to lock in today and walk but i took a shower before and didn't feel like getting sweaty and sticky so i didn't again -_-. i woke up and made myself the pancakes and the texture and shape was horrendous they looked sooo sad BUT they tasted amazing so i think it was worth it. i've been craving chcolate like crazy lately which is so bad... i ate another mini ice cream right after so my intake was like 400 before the day even started. i was gonna stop there or something but my dad made a smoothie which had me stressed ALL the way out. omg he was like watching as i drank it it's sick.. i purged as much as i could of it and felt worn out after so i took a nap for like 3hrs. i woke up at around 9ish and cleaned the kitchen and told myself i'd let myself eat an ice cream or have brown sugar oatmeal but i decided against it because i had no idea how many cals the smoothie was. i was literally stressing so hard thinking i drank like 2000 cals and i was gonna gain all my weight back but i put everything my dad used into chatgpt and it says the total for the WHOLE thing was like 1.3k and i only drank about 300... i rounded it to 400 though to be safe but also because ughhh idk. idk. i hope i wake up lighter tomorrow.
i noticed my jawline is back and i'm soo happy about it. i feel like i have a really pretty face but i had 'off' days at my normal weight where i'd just look.. idk weird i guess. but i've felt so pretty lately. my eyes are kinda normal sized but also slightly big but with the weight i've dropped they stand out so much more :). my nose looks smaller lips look fuller.. things are going right!!! falling into place!!! just need to be my goal weight. then ugw. PRAYYY. goodnight blog ♥